It’s the Simple Things that Make you Smile…

Simple Actions have big payoffs.

A smile can brighten a stranger’s lonely day.

A touch can renew a lover’s desire.

A lended ear can focus a wayward soul.

A hug can calm a sad heart.

How many simple little actions can you do in one day?

That’s the big payoff.

 

Hugs & wishes,

Brenda

~~“A Simple Action, Consistently done, Compounded over time, Creates a Predictable and Controllable Result” ~~

Ron Maurer

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Shop Talk…Lady’s BFF in the Bedroom

It has many names. Momma’s “back”  massager, Ole Faithful, Johnny Deep, The Thor-gasm, Earl the Pearl and Pookey’s fav tip of the hat – B.o.B. (battery operated boyfriend). Pet names for our vibrators; those valiant objects that stand at the ready for our pleasures. We are very protective of our personal love slaves. Hundreds of selection to entrust our every possible climatic whim. Women tend to not bring up their vibrator stories amongst other ladies; even their best girlfriends. We enshroud our battery operated rockets in clandestine fashion. Hiding them under the bed, in a drawer, between the mattresses away from sight. One of my favorite episodes from the HBO series “Sex and the City” was gregarious Samantha offering unwarranted vibrator advice in a sex store. Her classic one liner shows how much we need to feel free to talk about our vibrator lovers, ” Oh Honey, that one will burn your cl*t off!” Although sex is a very personal and private act, whether between a lover or a vibrator, we as women need to be allowed a chance to talk about the experience. To educate each other on a absolutely incredible journey of self-expression and discovery. I recently attended a more expensive sex toy line party for ladies.  Our host was honest and open about her choices. There was laughter and giggles as we passed around the devices. Quietly small conversations started up over a toy of choice. Some techie, “How long is the battery life?” Some conscientious, “I like that the batteries are rechargeable.” “I can’t wait to get home and charge my new toy up!”, profoundly to the point. As a participant and observer to these little focus groups I thought… this is healthy feminism. We were all at different places in our lives with different reasons for our purchases but felt comfortable to just talk about it. Free. Expressive. Light hearted. Women.

Several great places besides seedy sex shops to purchase a vibrator. In fact buy more than one. Variety of style and shape are okay in this case.

Some lingerie boutiques carry sex toy lines. Many are not allowed to advertise such “contraband” so use your detective skills to see if they sell female friendly pleasure devices.  FFPD.

Also great sites online. Adam & Eve – adameve.com; Vibrators. com, Jimmyjane.com (vibrators abstract enough to be in an art museum. Think I’m kidding?)

Hug & wishes,

Brenda

~~ “Carrie: I’m not going to replace a man with some battery-operated device.

Miranda: You haven’t met “The Rabbit.”

Samantha: Oh come on, if you’re going to get a vibrator, at least get one called “The Horse”!”~~

“Sexy and the City” HBO series


Someone’s Got My Goat…

Considered one of man’s earliest domesticated livestock, goats provided milk, cheese, meat, wool and companionship.  Relatively good natured beasts, they blended nicely with their other livestock counterparts. Folklore tells a tale of a goat in the stall of a horse or cow causing a calming effect on the other animal. Mischief makers wanting to bring bad luck or poor milk production would secretly remove the Zen-like beast from the stall. I wonder what the goat thought of it all? The saying ” Getting your goat” has no definite beginning.  Some say it’s a early 20th century prison slang word, others a welsh tale and some relate it back to the horse racing community. One thing is certain.  Don’t piss off a goat. It’s yoda-like instincts turn from sage to warrior. So what do we do when someone gets your goat? That unicorns and glitter part inside you battens down faster than you can say the words, “My Little Pony”.  Identity Threatening Action Alarm squeals out the call to arms.  Where is My Little Pony now? They have scattered for cover. Not a single beast stays except the goat.  Back turned away from the commotion and lazily trimming the green soft grass pasture called your happy place.  The mischief maker sneaking up on the goat, still so calm and seemingly unaware, yet inside the goat is waiting. Waiting to weigh its move. Unlike the other beasts it doesn’t pass judgement quickly and jump to conclusions. The goat waits to see what really happens. Then it can decide to defend, be passive or submit to defeat. But it’s a choice.

So like the goat,  we make the choice on how to respond. Even when the mischief maker causes great upheaval, really take the time to respond back. Usually you’ll see no response is warranted. Like the goat grazing in the pasture return to your everyday life uninterrupted.

Hugs & wishes,

Brenda

~~Don’t approach a goat from the front, a horse from the back or a fool from any side~~
Yiddish saying

We Cherish too, The Poppy Red

Historically long weekends allow us to pay tribute to monarchs, presidents, dignitaries, martyrs or peace makers. In the Modern age it’s become an excuse to vacation at the Summer house, BBQ on the back deck or shop the holiday sales at the local mall. We are as confused on the meaning of Memorial Day as the picture to the side. Are we paying remembrance to the “booty” of our fallen soldiers? Hey, I’m not saying I don’t live for long weekends in the Summer. Three chances for extra time with Pookey; carved out of somewhat opposing work schedules is a valuable commodity. Although our Summer national holidays mark the beginning, middle and end of a season, take some time to remember what those days mean to you, a friend in the service, our people. Not saying you have to agree with the current politics at large. But at some level being an American affects you…personally. This Memorial Day if you see an elderly gent or lady selling poppies after your donation ask them their story. My dad still talks about the first friend he lost in WWII; someone he went to college with at UBC. He gets a sad tone in his voice. I know his thoughts drift to what that man would have been if he hadn’t died. Put a personal story back into the meaning of this long weekend. Share it with someone else. Remember.

The red poppies meaning  – A brief bit of history. Memorial Day (Declaration Day) observation started shortly after the Civil War by General John Logan. He placed flowers on the graves of both Confederate and Union soldiers at Arlington National Cemetery.  New York state adopted the holiday in 1873 (shout out!)  and by 1890 the remaining Northern states followed suit. The Southern states didn’t adopt the observation til after WWI when the practice came to recognize soldiers killed in all wars. The South up to that point still had their own day honoring fallen Confederate soldiers (and many Southern states still have a separate observation day). In 1971 the last Monday in May became a Federally observed holiday called Memorial Day – a day honoring those that lost their lives fighting for the honor of America in any war. So back to why poppies on Memorial Day. Moina Michael back in 1915 gets all the credit.  Her idea stemming from a poem she was inspired to write.

We cherish too, the Poppy red
That grows on fields where valor led,
It seems to signal to the skies
That blood of heroes never dies.

So convicted she started to wear a red  poppy to honor those fallen on Memorial Day. She liked the idea so much she sold red poppies to her community around the holiday. Her proceeds went to soldiers in need. Some years go by and an affluent French lady heard about the poppy tradition. She loved the gesture so much she took it back to France to help raise money for orphaned and widowed children. Creating a Franco-American connection. Poppies were now an international symbol of charity and service remembrance. In the early 1920’s, the VFW was asked to help make poppies for sale. They recruited their disabled veterans to assemble the simple artificial flowers.  Thus starting the “Buddy” poppy program nationally. Puts some meaning back into that little red cloth flower again.

Hugs & wishes,

Brenda

~~ Each man is a hero and an oracle to somebody~~

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Goddess Pick of the Week…Devil May Care Boutique

Devil May Care  Boutique. 775 Park Ave, Rochester, NY

I love beautiful old Hollywood style lingerie. Victoria’s Secret used, and I say used to, have fabulous items. The workmanship was impeccable and lasted for years. As a young woman I was lost in piles of silk, satin and lace; forever entrapped in the decadence of what lies beneath clothing.  Since those early 90’s days it’s been slim pickings in Upstate NY. It seemed the golden era of lingerie had passed. The fashion pendulum swung away from high glamor towards being comfy and almost little girl like. Hardly a look I could pull off with my proportions. Finally, ladies (and their consorts) showed renewed interest in the art of wearing delicate lingerie. A few high end stores opened up around here in the past years. They carried beautiful bras, garters and panties but the years had played tricks on my size. Very few places accommodated the fuller and curvier shape of a lady with style. Enter Devil May Care. A lingerie boutique opened by two sisters who wanted an upscale luxurious atmosphere for women to shop for very personal attire. Totally committed to the soft feminist indulgences, priced to fit your clutch wallet and sized to fit your curves.

What did I buy that day? Alittle touch of old school tease mixed with sassy styling then all tucked away into a swanky black and pink package to go. Tell me I didn’t leave the store with a naughty grin gracing my face. Watch out Pookey, the Devil may care tonight…

To get a taste of Devil May Care watch this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aaJBpJUDUew.

Hugs & Wishes,

Brenda

~~if you’re wearing lingerie that makes you feel glamorous, you’re halfway there to turning heads~~

Elle Macpherson

Offline…please hold for an operator

Every once in awhile the day to day routine gets bumped off track. Be back blogging online next week. Enjoy your holiday weekend. Give thanks, live free and make sure to share a hug with someone close.

Hugs & wishes,

Brenda

~~How important it is for us to recognize and celebrate our heroes and she-roes!  ~~

Maya Angelou

Angel feathers…

I’m from your Guardian Angel
Who’s been assigned to you.
She dropped this in her struggles
As she protected you.

Each time you feel that you’re alone,
Each time you nearly fall
I’m here to remind you:
You’re not alone at all.

~unknown author

My dad and I share more than our crooked middle fingers. He always has known by the look in my eyes or the tone of my voice exactly what’s going on inside me. I’ve never been able to hide away from him. As a child I adored it. As a teenager I defied it. As a young adult I hoped for it. Now as a middle aged women I share it. Within an instant his first hello across the miles of telephone wire says all I need to know. Connected through love I feel his thoughts. If I believe in guardian angels of earthly form, then we are that to each other. Tonight I will leave a feather by his bed to show I was there. Maybe a peacock feather – a symbol of protection.

All of us have that potential to be an angel. It’s the love and compassion inside bursting out by way of our speech and actions. We reach out without expectation of praise and retreat back to our normal routine afterwards. Just cause it’s the right thing to do. See if before the weekend is done you can be an earthly angel to someone who crosses your everyday path.

Hugs& wishes,

Brenda

~~Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul – and sings the tunes without the words – and never stops at all.~~

Emily Dickinson

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